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  • Writer's pictureSona Parmar


Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness.

It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift.

- Mary Oliver

I am sad.

I don’t want to be sad.

I want to be happy.

All the successful people who are making it in the world, they’re happy. All the time. I know this for sure.

But I am sad, ergo, I am unsuccessful.

I need to figure how to be happy, and fast. Time is meant to be my most valuable commodity.

But I am still sad.

The stupid sadness isn’t going anywhere.

The tightness of the dry tears under my eyelids is a welcome distraction from my burning eyes. I am reminded of the fact that I am not sleeping.

I need to have a better night tonight.

I need to not be sad.

I need to not clench my teeth as I write - but if I don’t, I might cry again.

Stupid tears.

Stupid tears.

I hate the word acceptance right now. It’s doesn’t change jack. My eyes still sting. My heart still aches.

I sigh.

I take a deep breath. And then I take another. I try to remind myself that by regulating my breath, I can regulate my emotions.

But my chest feels heavy.

I just feel sad.

I let myself feel sad.

It’s OK to feel sad.

It will pass.

In time.

It all passes. In time.

I can be sad.

It’s OK.

It’s OK.

But it’s not OK.

Nothing is OK.

And just at that moment, I feel an angel next to me. She whispers in my ear.

“If it’s not OK, it’s not the end.”

I sigh.

It will be OK.


One day.


The angel said so.

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Martin Muya
Martin Muya
Nov 12, 2021

It shall pass! It will pass.

Happiness will find you just like sadness did.

Sona Parmar
Sona Parmar
Nov 15, 2021
Replying to

Thank you, Marting. In fact, it's exactly a post that I have already begun... :)

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